Matt says, It seems to me that the real problem is that general public is still clinging to the concept “nice guy” vs. “jerks” when in reality this is not the case. I think that’s exactly the case. In the same way guys think they’re supposed to be jerks, chicks think that guys are supposed to be jerks and a self-fulfilling prophecy is created: Jerks get the girl because everybody thinks that’s the way it’s supposed to be. It is reality because people think it’s reality.

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Wow, I think you just blew my mind, dude! Yeah a lot of nice guys are, in fact, BORING. And I don’t do boring. I want someone who will challenge me, someone who can worship me one moment, and spit on me the next. Literally. :) And he has to be intuitive enough to know what I want/need, and when. And he has to be man enough to want a partner who is both a mother and a whore. This is why BDSM is so great, because it allows you to act out the good, the bad, and the ugly. Very therapeutic.

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You’re one of the few male “pick up” bloggers who seems to have it right. Most guys seem to think “If she doesn’t want a nice guy, I’ll act like a total douche and care about no one’s feeling but my own! That’ll reel in the ladies!” Yeah, no. Hold your own, show initiative and power, be confident (oh, and a motorcycle can’t hurt) but at the end of the day, you can’t relate with a guy who’s nothing but a jerk. There’s a time and a place for being an Alpha male.

• Dutch Loveawake

the comments I’ve read here seem incredibly shallow and narrow minded. why do so many people insist on making relationships more complicated than they need to be? the idea that nice guys finish last sounds incredibly childish to me. why can’t more people just accept other people as “people” and stop putting labels on each other? no wonder our society is going down the toilet. I’m a nice guy and I’m proud of it. if any of you women out there are sick and tired of treated like dirt by the so-called “alpha males”, then feel free to send me an e-mail. if not, then you’re just getting what you deserve. let’s grow up people.

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Guys need to be taught what women have been taught for years: how to play hard to get. But the secret to playing anything is to actually BE it. Don’t be easy! Nobody wants something that is easy to get. A woman wants a pair of shoes, if she finds she can’t afford them or they are not available in her size, she wants them more. Same for men. We all want what we can’t have. So how can a guy be nice but still be elusive? Get busy! Have a life that is more important than seeing her. You can get away with sending flowers and writing poems and all that wussy stuff as long as you’re painfully unavailable some of the time. But that’s the key, you can’t just be unavailable and cold about it. She will lose interest. Be as romantic as you can but PLEASE have something else to do. NEVER stay too long. Never call too often. Leave her swept off her feet, but please leave.

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